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Author Topic: The old hall of flame  (Read 197 times)

Offline Flu

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The old hall of flame
« on: January 24, 2021, 09:16:24 pm »
"Someone apparently rerouted your brainstem to your asshole and you've crapped yourself a nice little opinion on this whole subject.." -Ruthless1

"I took your motherís virginity, but I let your pops have the box it came in." -poo

"I advise you to split like your drawbridge asscheeks for an on coming gang of drunken sailors, because the only thing your throwing around here is a hissy fit, Pippy." -Eddy Torezs

"Close your lip smacking bitchmouth before I headbutt you into a midget, twinkletoes. " -Ruthless1

"Shush your fuck blistered lips already and dont let me hear that dick speedbagged yap babble-on any more, lest I unzip your mask and plant a man gland hand grenade in the confined restraints of your leather clad face prsion, ya piston fucked fetus. " -Sicness

"You're not Sherlock Holmes, so close the fucking case and stop this miserable attempt to follow my trail of footsteps while wearing a deerskin hunting cap and sucking in smoke from your Sir Conan O'Doyle signature series crack pipe, ya delusional dick detective with one private eye on my trouser prize." -Running Gag

"And again the point sails over your head like the cardboard cutout hand of Bugs Bunny measuring kids at the fun park, shrimp." -Ruthless1

"You couldn't look like a bigger ass if you were attached to the backside of Oprah." -B.Hankins

"You're the only person I ever knew who won a hotdog eating contest with his ass." -Vanius Gullius

""Now plop your loose hinged ham catcher into your clapper activated wheelchair and watch as we send you off a third floor balcony with a rousing round of applause, Skipper." -Running gag

"People in glass bath-houses shouldnt throw stones." -Ruthless1

"What? You won?! You couldnt win a cigar after giving birth in a tobacco field in Havana, fucko" -Ruthless1

"You, sir, are gayer than Grahm kerr cooking a meaty rumproast while wearing a see-through teddy." -Ruthless1

"When you flame something besides the legs of your Mudd Jeans when you spray them with unleaded gasoline at a self serve then try to strike a blue tip on your frisbee sized NAMBLA beltbuckle, I'll take you a little more seriously, clod." -Herro

"If you ever fucking waste my time again with another one of these sonnets to your new Triple H doll with removable spandex and chokehold dick grip, I will uppercut your retractable jaw so hard your head snaps backward and the tracheotomy hole in your throat spits out rainbow flavored M&Ms like the gayest pez dispenser ever made." -Running Gag

"Now I do admit that the fact that you consider yourself my own personal pet chimp is cute, however I've already punted you like a big furry football twice now and I'm about to do it again, Coco." -flu

"If I want your opinion, I'll unzip your mask, gimp.." -Ruthless1

"SHUT THE FUCK UP or I will personally call you out and beat you like a 4' 6" camel jockey trying to take over a Pittsburgh Steelers chartered jet to Philadelphia with a rubber knife." -Bailey Hankins

"You're a fucking treadmark on society. I could scissorkick your asshole up your back so hard you'd look like a volcano if someone buried you up to your neck and you took a shit, shemp." -Tuff

"Just because I've popped one of your glass eyes out, stuck my index finger into your ocular cavity and spun your head around like a rotary phone, while listening to the sounds of the dried baby batter rattle around in your head like a maraca doesn't mean I'm cuing you to start gabbing away like Riki from 'My So Called Life'." -flu

"What? I know you'd love to take your dentures out and spitshine my jousting stick for an indian head nickel like in the "good ol' days", but here's a newsflash you wheelchair bound aboriginee: you only need to save sheet metal to patch up the skylight in your tincan townhouse and the great depression will be over as soon as you button your flapping upturned lip, pappy." - Buzzsaw

"'Flame'? You couldnt blaze up a motherfucking Chinese fireworks plant built on top of a busted propane pipeline with an M2A1 flamethrower strapped to the fucking Hindenberg." -Captn Yoaz

"Now clap your fucking hands, powering up your clapper activated rough rider with wheels, pull your legs behind that watermelon head of yours and rectum roll the fuck out of here." -flu

"Your main dysfunction is caused by the irrational belief that flaming someone is the same as belching a rancid cum bubble in their direction. Even if you can light it on fire, it still pops, releasing the note from your last fortune cookie: "You will meet a tall dark stanger. Wear knee pads." -Bailey Hankins

"Do us all a favor, and dive headfirst off the Brooklyn Bridge with a 1978 GE microwave tied around your neck." - Running Gag

"And while you were blundering around the room like a starved blind sweaty sumo searching for the slab of steak I tied to your to your headset antennae and dangled in front of your mouth because I unhitched your eyebrow clamps, I was jogging laps around your airliner capacity colon, stopping only to punch your slanted agoogle eyes back into the sockets mid lap, and to hand out anti-alternative lifestyle booklets every time I caught a puerto-rican loitering around your ham-hatch." -Herro

"As you whirl and gibber across the stage you scream "This is ART! This is ART!" almost as loudly as your belly shirt, rawhide chaps, and patent leather Shirley Temple autograph tap shoes scream "I'm in love with Ricky Martin!" -Bailey Hankins

"I cold clocked you on the top of your lemon shaped/sized head so hard your retractable jaw unhinged and dangled around down your knocking knees for about three seconds before my second blow sent it right back up where it came from, only past your treadmarked poodle face, over the top of your head, and down behind your "arse", swallowing the upper half of your body and sending you stumbling blindly back into the "time out" chair in the corner." -Herro

"As it is, you couldn't even figure out how to use a Craftsman screwdriver without a manual, so I highly doubt you'll be doing much of anything except strap it on to the top of your head backwards and headbutt your friends in the ass." -Tuff

"Break that carrot off you have lodged inside you sideways, take a bite of it and swallow in hopes that your eye sight gets better because at this rate the only thing your eye socket will be good for is having a hard cock bottom out inside of it." -Flu

"I guess that makes you just about the 493rd retarded, drooling hobo to get all up in your nappy weave about it only to find out that your "Weave" is actually your Fruit of the Loom Y-fronts, which are now unraveled around your knocking knees, thus exposing your two and a quarter inches of uncut manhood to the entire chuckling audience." -Herro

"Bitch, I was looking for a fight NOT a wheelchair race." -Blackout

"Draw an asshole around an electrical socket and fuck it, pussy."- flu

"Now take your one fucking clue, your six week supply of bunion brillo and your fold out Will Smith Willenum pictorial collection and bounce right on out of here before I deflect your pugnose mug off the nearest doorjamb like a superball, Stuart." -Herro

"Listen, you Barry Williams fucker, I'll lance my fuckin' fist through your two giant front teeth like saloon doors and proceed to bust it out the back of your pre-hollowed noggin, you Clydesdale cock mounting moron." -Ruthless1

"The only thing you're slamming into is the three foot tall Maginot line of Lego's you surround your Muscle Beach sandcastle with when I finally manage to gain a firm hold of your shit slicked rattail and launch you headfirst into the barricade like a lightning pink blitzkrieg with your mullet flapping behind you in a farewell salute to Deutschland." -Running Gag

"I'm about two seconds from driving down to the airport, booking an immediate flight to Pee-Wee's alternative Playhouse and stomping that talking cock box beachball size melon of yours into enough ground beef quarter pounders to infect your whole hick truck stop community with Mad Gay disease." -Herro

"The only thing you're slamming into is the three foot tall Maginot line of Lego's you surround your Muscle Beach sandcastle with when I finally manage to gain a firm hold of your shit slicked rattail and launch you headfirst into the barricade like a lightning pink blitzkrieg with your mullet flapping behind you in a farewell salute to Deutschland." -Running Gag

"Why bother, kicking you around is almost as fun as impregnating your buck toothed momma, promising her this time I won't make her get an abortion only to shove my fist so far into her stomach, I shake hands with her spine and a dead little fetus pops out from between her catfish lips. How the fuck did you survive that anyway?" -Flu

"I'm about to hook up a pair of fucking jumper cables to your nipple engagement rings and sent ten thousand volts through your semen stream until you light up like a queer Bat signal telling the Fleet to come back in." -Running Gag

"One thing's for sure - you'll never be mistaken for Henry Wadsworth Longfellow; not even if your first name were Henry, your cock spanned the Atlantic and you ejaculated gold bars." -girl

"Why bother? I'll just throw a stick into the spokes of your rainbow colored tandem razor scooter and let the asphalt do the work ." -flu

"Someone apparently rerouted your brainstem to your asshole and you've crapped yourself a nice little opinion on the whole subject, ya squid. -Ruthless1

"Once again the point sails over your head like the cardboard cutout hand of Bugs Bunny measuring kids at the fun park, shimp. -Ruthless1

"One more whelp out of you and I'll tie your three fingered left hand to the laces on the worn, splitsole converse hightop on your right foot, pull your poison wifebeater up over your mascera running eyelids, duct tape a festive bow to the sqeaky bald spot on the side of your sideways head, and send the entire gay package to the salvation army as a belated christmass donation for the homosexual underclass, you turkey slicking shit slurpee" -Herro

"If I wanted the time of day I'd lay you out at high noon and read your beak like a fuckin' sundial, Babs." - buzzsaw

"Quit performing analingus on your loose bowelled labrador and reveal your pointed head so that I can level it back out with my highschool's pottery kiln." -Peeing Dog

"So maybe you should rethink your strategy, because sitting back with a glazed over look on your face while I yoyo with your heart isn't what I would consider intimidating, unless of course you're trying to drown me with your spunk infested man juices, in that case, oh no, you got me you twisty turny deep sea rod wrangler." - flu

"The reason that you don't appear to be getting 'it', is because 'it' is rythmically clubbing the fingerprinted balt spot on top of your KFC greased monk cut into the far reaches of that STD playground and denture depository you refer to as a small intestine." - Herro

"You're still a crippled half assed fuckwit rolling over for a belly rub and a chance to lick your own balls." - Blackout

"Go back to your retarded cubby hole where the only thing you're proud of is the 8 inch corn row you did on your mother's happy trail." - Lady Phoenix

Offline Administrator

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Re: The old hall of flame
« Reply #1 on: February 05, 2021, 07:58:02 am »
Welcome back, former champion.
Unfortunately, I don't have access to the old archives or I'd gladly post them.

I do appreciate your addition to this forum with a lot of "classic one-liners" from the past.
It was certainly a good read, and it brought back a lot of memories. 
We need to start making new ones now.